Family First

Love him or hate him, Duke Men's Head Basketball Coach Mike Krzyzewski is heading to the Sweet Sixteen again after defeating Michigan State this evening. He has been the coach at Duke since 1980, earning five national titles, twelve Final Four appearances, fifteen Athletic Coast Conference (ACC) Tournament championships, and thirteen ACC regular-season titles. Coach K has more wins than anyone at any level in college basketball. As if that is not an impressive enough resume, he also coached the USA Men's Basketball team, winning three consecutive gold medals. 

Coach K first appeared on my radar many years ago as a college basketball fan but endeared himself to me with a story. I heard that he started the first practice of each new college basketball season by writing "integrity" on a whiteboard. Coach K would then go on to define it as "Doing the right thing when no one else is looking." I often used that quote as a teacher and when I coached early on in my teaching career. Needless to say, I was not nearly as successful as Coach K. 

Last June, Coach K announced his retirement, effective at the end of the 2021 - 2022 season. His final home game at Cameron Indoor Stadium was a loss to Duke's ACC rival, North Carolina. Not exactly the way he wanted to go out, I'm certain. When the game was over, the teams shook hands, and the entire Duke team retreated to their locker room. Not one person left the arena, as there was to be a celebration of Coach K's career shortly after the game ended. 

When Coach K re-emerged from the locker room to make his way back out to the court to be honored for his efforts, he was surrounded by his family and holding his wife's hand. Before he took the microphone to speak to the faithful 9,314 fans (capacity at Cameron), he went over to the sideline and was engulfed in an embrace by all his grandchildren. When he finally took the microphone, surrounded by his family, he spoke about basketball. But he also talked about family. 

Coach K shared that his very first athletic director, Tom Butters, the man who hired him in 1980, taking a chance on a little-known 33-year-old coach from Army, said: "It's not your job. It's your family's job. Whatever you're doing, include your family." What a fantastic statement to hear from your boss as you start a new job. Let's be honest, this is the reality for every single one of us, even those of us who don't earn the same kind of fame as Coach K. 

Our families are with us at work, even if they're not physically present. They're on our minds and on our hearts, especially as we navigated these past two years. One of my best principals said something beautiful when he met my then-girlfriend, now wife; he said to her, "Thank you for sharing Brian with us." When I meet families of people who serve with us in St. Johnsbury, I try to remember to say that. Because the truth is, our families are always there for us, no matter what is happening at work. Our families are always there for us. 

So I'll be rooting for Coach K to finish his career with one more championship. Not just because of how he coaches. Not just because of his definition of integrity. Because of what his priorities are when it comes to his family. 

It's not your job. It's your family's job. Whatever you're doing, include your family. 

Photo Courtesy of www.dreamstime.com