Where Did the Time Go?

This week, an e-mail arrived in the inbox that I should have been expecting, but it still surprised me. 

Our oldest son is indeed going to be in high school before the end of this calendar year. It seems hard to believe that is the case, especially given everything that has gone on in our world. And yet, time stops for no one. Not even those of us living through a global health pandemic. This e-mail really touched my heart. 

This month, fifteen years ago, we found out that we were pregnant with Patrick Michael Ricca, named after My Wife's father, who passed away when she was ten. I cried tears of joy when she called me at work and simply said, "What do you want to name him if he's a boy?" When I responded with silence, she then asked, "OK, what do you want to name her if she's a girl?" I put the phone down on the desk and wept. 

We met while teaching next door to each other at a school on the Near Westside of Chicago. Of course, we wanted to have children. And in January of 2006, we learned that would happen for us. 

Parenting is the hardest thing I've ever done, and I'm blessed to have someone who does it with me, and candidly, is better at it than I am! I once read that parenting is like living your life with your heart exposed for all the world to see. Those of you who are parents know that you feel deeply all the feelings your own children feel; when they hurt, you hurt with them, and when they feel joy, you feel that joy as well. 

Parenting is also full of firsts - from the moment you bring them home. The first words, the first steps, the first day of school, the first bike ride, the first time in the ocean, the first team joined, the first failed friendship, the first school project, the first report card, the first school dance, the first independent project, the first e-mail from high school. None of it has stopped for COVID.

We look back at the hard moments fondly; we look forward to the unknown with anticipation and some anxiety. Hearing from friends who are "behind" us on their parenting journey and listening to their stories sounds almost quaint. Listening to friends who are "ahead" of us helps us think about the bridges we will need to cross. 

I'm so proud of this young man that I've known for more than fifteen years, whose arrival in August of 2006 took both My Wife and me by surprise. He's learned to navigate this COVID world with the same grace and integrity as he has handled the other curveballs life has thrown at him. And yet, there's still a big part of me that can't believe he's going to high school. 

I know he will find a way to shine in high school, as he's found his way to shine to this point in his life. And still, I see this little face looking at me in pictures around our house. 

Patrick, at 21 months

But I do know where the time went. It went into this young man that I'm over-the-moon proud of.