And Other Duties, As Assigned

This past week, I went to Union Elementary School for classroom visits.  As I always do, I checked in at the front office to let folks know I would be there.  To my surprise, two new faces were at the desk: Anne Fraser one of our Instructional Assistants and Diadel Ortiz who directs our after school program.  Normally, I would see Diana Koliander-Hart and Pam Foster who ensure that the trains run on time at UES.

I soon found out they were at a training and as Anne rose from the desk, she told me with a smile it was now "my turn" as she needed to get back to her regular duties.  I paused.  Classroom visits are one of my favorite parts about being Superintendent.  Interacting with students and teachers in their learning environments, building relationships, listening to what is happening on a day-to-day basis, shows Montpelier Public Schools that I mean what I say when I commit to every student feeling safe and included when they come to school.

And yet, there was a concrete need in front of me.  I could not say no - this is what UES needed to ensure that the school continued to run smoothly.  Now please know that I have never been officially seated in that chair.  Clearly, I can answer the phone, but I am well aware that front-office Administrative Assistant positions are critical to a well-run building.  And there is so much more to those positions than simply answering the phone.  Anyone who has spent any time in schools knows that is a fact.  This was the view from my chair that day:

As it turns out, there was very little for me to do while I was there.  The phone rang and was answered by Diadel.  A couple of folks inquired about whether or not there was outdoor recess.  The front door chimed once, and Diadel let that person in.  She showed me the steps to do it the next time it rang but it never did again while I was there.

Soon, Diana returned and shortly after that, Pam did as well.  I was on my way to my classroom visits.  But I was also struck by how uncomfortable and nervous I was being thrust into a position that I was not familiar with.  It made me grateful, incredibly grateful, for all the employees of MPS who do many, many jobs that I am not nearly proficient in.  We rely on each other to ensure that the mission is a reality for all students.  Without the capable and fabulous staff members in our district, along with countless volunteers, we would not be able to serve our students and their families in the consistent, thorough, and thoughtful way that we do. 

Instruction is at the core of education.  Yet it would be shortsighted to fail to recognize the critical role that staff play in the lives of our students and their families.  At the very heart, education is a human endeavor; and we do it together.  We are all part of the wonderful enterprise that we call Montpelier Public Schools.  When we make mistakes, the errors are shared and our joys are multiplied when we succeed.  It is, as it always has been and will continue to be, about relationships. 

Are You Listening?

This year, all of Montpelier Public Schools are renewing our commitment toward equity.  The Leadership Team is working with CQ Strategies in their "We All Belong" series.  Rebecca Haslam from the Burlington School District and Seed the Way is working with our faculties to bring more awareness to the concrete ways we can make equity a reality for all students in our classrooms. 

For me, equity is ensuring that every one of our students has what s/he needs to feel safe and included, so that s/he can learn to their potential.  It is distinct from equality, in which every student gets the "same".  The image below from Cultural Organizing is one of my favorites that demonstrates the difference:

I've been visiting Faculty Meetings at each of the schools and recently I was struck by the candor and frankness of a conversation.  Part of creating a space for all students to feel safe and included, is ensuring there is room for adults to make mistakes, learn and grow.  As part of this conversation, one of the teachers challenged the entire room to be sure that we are listening, both to each other as adults and more importantly, to our students. 

Our students are speaking to us and they are speaking clearly.  Some have told us they don't feel particularly welcome in school because of the color of their skin.  Some have told us they don't feel particularly safe in school because of the gender they identify as.  Some have told us they don't feel particularly included because of whom they love. 

Our students are speaking to us and we are working by bringing equity to the forefront of our faculty meetings.  What are the next steps we need to take to ensure that all of Montpelier Public Schools' students feel safe and included when they come to school? 

We do not have all the answers yet.  But we are listening. 

Even Adults Make Mistakes

This past Thursday, we celebrated a mistake.  Yes, you read that correctly.  This past Thursday we celebrated a mistake.  The Montpellier Herault Sports club is a French association football club based in France.  It was discovered in September that their game jerseys contained a misspelling; the jerseys were missing one "l".  The story received international attention three months ago, and just this weekend, even NPR covered it. 

Instead of sending the misspelled jerseys back to the manufacturer, the French city officials reached out to our one "l" Montpelier city officials and arranged for the jerseys to be sent to us.  We held a Skype ceremony to connect with our closely named counterparts in Europe.  It was a wonderful opportunity to meet - albeit electronically - people whose path we normally would not have crossed. 

We had students from each of our schools represented, Union Elementary School, Main Street Middle School, and Montpelier High School.  What a unique moment for them to be a part of.  One that started from a mistake. 

We spend a good deal of time correcting mistakes as educators, and really as human beings.  It seems that it's more of a one-way street, with adults doing a fair amount of the correcting for our students.  As adults, it's critical that we are open to having our students point out the places we have misstepped; since it is all in the name of lifelong learning, there is no shame in making mistakes. 

This week the City of Montpellier, France modeled that the most important step after to take once a mistake is made is how to correct it.  In this case, relationships were bridged across two continents.  What a beautiful life lesson for our students to witness. 

Paying it Forward

I had My Boys with me at work last Monday, as they had no school and Montpelier Public Schools were open.  I'm very grateful to work in a place that welcomes My Children when need be.  Everyone is so kind to them when they're with me, people go out of their way to talk with them, and especially the people in Central Office make them feel like a part of the family. 

Their favorite pizza in Montpelier is at Positive Pie and I took them there to grab some slices for lunch.  We parked on State Street and as we walked to the restaurant, we passed another favorite lunch spot of mine Wilaiwan's, which was closed.  I explained to My Boys how much I love their authentic Thai food and hopefully the next time they come to work with me, we can eat there.

As we continued west on State Street, I heard a voice call out, "Wait, wait, this is for you!"  I turned to see Dang, one of the people that works in Wilaiwan's running down the street toward us.  She handed me two jars and said, "Happy Thanksgiving.  I know how much you love our spicy hot sauce."  With that she turned and ran off, leaving me stunned on the sidewalk.

I was blown away by the kindness and generosity Dang showed me.  My Boys could not understand what just happened, so I explained to them who Dang was, how thoughtful a gift she shared, and why it was so meaningful to me.  

We continued on to Positive Pie, where I ordered some slices and drinks to go.  While waiting, I put the two jars on the counter, prompting the woman taking my order to say, "I gotta ask, what's with the jars?"  Beaming, I explained what had just happened.  

The woman's face broke into a huge smile, as she admitted how much she too loves their food.  We both admitted to "tipping back" the bowl at the end of our meal to ensure that no scrap of food, no matter how small, is ever left behind.  We continued to chat a bit about how kind Dang's gesture was.  As I was paying for our pizza, the woman looked at me and said, "I'm so touched by this, that I'm going to do something similar to someone else today." 

I hope you're touched by kindness and choose to continue spreading it this week.  

On Being Grateful

This is one of my favorite weeks of the year.  This is a holiday that has no gifts except the presence of others.  No gifts, except the gift of time.  No gifts, except the gift of relationships that grow and expand around the table. 

Not everyone will be as fortunate as My Family and me.  For many of our students, the holiday season brings uncertainty.  Uncertainty of food, heat, and in some cases love.  For many of our adults, the holiday season means challenging family dynamics for some and being alone for some others. 

I am grateful to serve in a community where a message like this resonates.  I am grateful to serve with other adults who care about the whole child.  I am grateful to serve in a district where adults step up to help other adults in times of need.  I am grateful to serve with others for whom relationships matter. 

The first goal in the MPS Action Plan is to provide equitable learning opportunities for all students.  At a conference recently, Vermont Secretary of Education Rebecca Holcombe reminded us that equity is not a zero sum game.  Giving to those in need, does not mean taking away from others.  I am grateful to serve in the state of Vermont. 

What are you grateful for this week of Thanksgiving?

Two Words: Thank You

This past week I was able to reconnect with a professor I had when I was a student at the College of the Holy Cross.  I had written him an e-mail earlier in the week to thank him.  His courses inspired me to work for social justice and it is through education that I have kept that commitment.

We were able to briefly chat on the phone and I thanked him for the tremendous impact he had on my life.  We had not spoken since I graduated in May of 1996.  I chose to volunteer when I graduated and joined a program called Inner-City Teaching Corp where I learned how to be a teacher.  In the summer of 1999, a Providence College graduate joined the staff of the school where I was assigned, also a volunteer with Inner-City Teaching Corps.  She was from Vermont and taught right next door to me.  In the fall of 2000, we had our last first date ever, we got married in 2004, and moved to Vermont in 2007.

I thanked my professor for inspiring me to pursue social justice because it led me to meet My Wife, with similar passions for equity, and that gift of marriage has led to two beautiful children and a wonderful life in Vermont.  For me, in a very real way, Professor James Nickoloff put me on a path to where I am right now.

Teaching makes a difference in the lives of teachers and our students.

In our final year in Chicago, I was teaching in a high school.  One of my students was accepted to Holy Cross and I could not have been more delighted and proud.  When she told me, I insisted that she find another mentor of mine while I was there.  Kim McElaney was the Director of the Office of the College Chaplains and was a part of the Mexico Immersion Program that I was privileged to be a part of - another key moment in my social justice journey.  That student, like the rest of the Class of 2007 graduated, and at the end of that school year My Family and I moved to Vermont.

Sadly, Kim passed away 2010 and because she was incredibly important to me, I went to her funeral.  While reconnecting with many dear friends whom I had not seen since my own graduation, I felt a tap on my shoulder and heard the words, "Mr. Ricca?"  I could not imagine who that would be.  No one called me that while I was at Holy Cross.

I turned to find my former student from Chicago, the Class of 2007, with tears in her eyes.  When I asked her what she was doing here, she responded, "Mr. Ricca, you told me that when I went to Holy Cross that I had to find Kim McElaney.  Well... I did."

Teaching makes a difference in the lives of teachers and our students.

Based on the nature of education, we rarely if ever see the fruits of our efforts.  One of the goals in the MPS Action Plan is for all students to take "an active role in shaping their learning experiences and developing who they are as learners."  That cannot happen in a vacuum - it happens with the faculty, staff, and leadership in our district.  It happens in the classrooms, on our athletic fiends, in the hallways, on stage, in rehearsals, and on field trips.  It happens in real conversations.  It happens because of relationships.

This week, it was a thank you to a professor that was twenty-one years in the making.  Not twenty-one years late.  I had no idea how my life would turn out when I graduated from Holy Cross in 1996 and when I look back I can see who those people who shaped my learning experiences were; those people who helped develop me as a learner left an indelible imprint in my heart.  Thank you.

Do you Brush & Floss Everyday?

This past Wednesday, the MPS Leadership Team took part in the second day of training in the We All Belong Series with CQ Strategies, as we grow our own cultural competency.  One of the goals in the MPS Action Plan is "To implement an articulated multi-tiered system of support to provide equitable learning opportunities for students in safe and inclusive learning environments."  A substantial part of that commitment is working to address our own shortcomings and actively grow as leaders in MPS for this work.

During one of the morning discussions, one of the participants asked our facilitators if there is a way to fully overcome unconscious bias.  The facilitator paused before answering and the answer was stunning in its simplicity.  "Well, do you brush and floss everyday?  While doing that is never going to fully prevent dental decay and larger problems in your mouth we still know that is just good dental hygiene."

We all do something everyday that is not guaranteed to make a difference but is considered just good practice.

I have unconscious biases, simply by growing up and breathing in the ethos in the United States of America.  We all have unconscious biases that impact us as we go about living in the world.  Anyone who says otherwise is simply not being fully honest.  Once we have admitted that we have biases, we must take the next step to ensure that we are working to keep them in check and do what we can to minimize their impact on our day-to-day relationships.

And for those of us in education, the expectations are much higher.  We must be vigilant not only for the biases in our own life; we must be just as vigilant for evidence of biases in our students, in our schools, and our community.  As educators, our responsibilities include educating the whole child, not just the head but the heart as well.  We must ensure that our students are practicing habits that will prevent further development of biases, as they move in relationships not only during the school day but during the rest of their lives as well.  We state in MPS that one of our goals is to have our students be in "safe and inclusive learning environments."  We have a responsibility to our students, as well as to our fellow human beings to be aware of our unconscious biases.

During the Rowland Foundation (@RowFn) Annual Conference in late October, Professor Ruha Benjamin (ruha9) inspired and challenged us around issues of race in the state of Vermont.  A tweet from MHS Principal Mike McRaith (@mikemcraith) summed up her message insightfully:

There are real issues of equity and privilege in our state.  They extend beyond that of just race and include class, gender, gender identify, and ability to name just a few.  Anyone who feels marginalized in 2017, who is not a position of privilege, is working harder and harder everyday to overcome the injustice AND then engage in the process of learning.

I am not whole, because I am overserved and have privilege.  I promise to brush and floss everyday to try to keep my unconscious biases in check but will need help with my blind spots.  Will you help me?  I promise to help you with yours, so that we can honor all our students to make schools truly safe and inclusive for all of them.

Who We Hire Matters

In seven years serving in Montpelier Public Schools, I am fortunate to have hired many, many people to serve with us.  I consider hiring to be my most substantive, practical contribution to the work of education in our district.  Whether a teacher, a member of the Leadership Team or a staff member, we all work together to make the mission a reality for all our students and their families.  People make the difference in the human endeavor of education. 

This past week, I had a first.  I had the privilege of hiring a student who graduated during the time that I've been serving as Superintendent of Schools.  This is not something that I will ever forget.  In all my time in education, I have never hired someone who has graduated from the place where I served, while I was there. 

The first thought that crossed my mind when I saw the name was, "Wow, I'm getting old."  This often happens to me when I come across students from my past years in education.  Thanks to Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn, I am able to reconnect with students from as far away as Chicago.  In my mind, they are still in the same classrooms and grade cohorts when I last saw them.  It's mind boggling to me when I see they have real jobs, when they have gotten married, and in some cases they now have children of their own.  It truly is the only thing that makes me feel old; when I see where my former students are now, based on where and when I knew them. 

My second thought when I saw the name of the candidate being recommended to me was sheer pride and a deep, deep sense of gratitude for all the adults that shaped this young person during their time in MPS.  I can think of no greater compliment to our district than when a student graduates and then chooses to apply to work professionally with us again.  And to be clear, I take no credit for this.  This young person graduated in 2013, and I was only in MPS for two years when they walked across the stage and we shook hands. 

In the interview, it was clear that this young person deliberately and thoughtfully applied to MPS.  This was not someone who simply put in an application anywhere the professional skill set was a match.  In my experience, rarely do those applicants get to my desk for an interview.  No, this individual wanted to return to the community that was responsible for a K - 12 education that still was in the forefront of his mind.  Naming people who made a difference in that journey for him was easy, and the reasons for those people's mention had substance and meaning. 

The other reason why this was a special hire to me, besides the reality of it being my first, is that I knew this young person.  He made a point of introducing himself and having many conversations with me during my first two years.  We have stayed in touch since graduation, as I've written letters of recommendation on his behalf.  This individual has stopped by Central Office when home on breaks and has made a point of being present in MPS.  It was clear to me that there was a sense of community that mattered to this young person and so it was no surprise that he applied for a job, so that he could continue to engender the sense of community he felt. 

To all the individuals that shaped the education of Alex Clark, MHS Class of 2013, I thank you for making his experience one that left an indelible place in his heart and made him want to serve with us professionally.  Please help me welcome him home to the MPS Community!

Students Shaping a Better Narrative

This past week, three Union Elementary School students found a $100 bill on their way to school.  Without being prompted by an adult, they chose to turn in the money to Anne Fraser, a staff member they knew.

To celebrate and honor these fine young people, the Montpelier Police Chief Anthony Facos and our School Resource Officer Corporal Matt Knisley came to a school-wide celebration this week.  

Not only did each student receive a certificate from the Police Department honoring their integrity, they also received the $100 bill back.  During the explanation, Chief Facos explained that normally the police will hold on to lost and found items but because the department was so impressed by the character these young people showed, the department chipped in to cover the $100.  

Another young person from Union Elementary School was highlighted this week, for her generosity.  Maggie McGibney a kindergarten student, donated her birthday gifts to The Good Samaritan Haven in Barre.  Her story was in the Times Argus this week, click here to read it.  

Given what is in the news regularly, it would be easy to understand if we failed to see stories like these.  In and of itself, that is reason enough to share and highlight what wonderful things are happening in our world.  

It is a gift - truly a gift - to be in education these days.  Young people by their nature are curious, kind, and have a bright outlook on the future.  You need look no further than our schools to see just that.  I feel very fortunate that when I get frustrated by the polarization that I see in the world and on the news, I need look no further than where I serve to be more inspired and more hopeful.  

It is easy and understandable to find current events in 2017 overwhelming and at times downright sad.  I assure you that there are plenty of wonderful stories, happening right inside our very own public schools.  

It's A Small World

My Family and I were out to dinner while on vacation on the Outer Banks, in North Carolina.  It's one of our favorite places, called Food Dudes.  It's located basically in a strip mall and it is fantastic food, with a wonderful staff!

After we were seated at one of the tables by the front, we ordered and I noticed a minivan in the parking lot.  It had a green license plate, and it wasn't Colorado.  What are the odds that someone from Vermont was here in North Carolina?  I looked further at the plate and saw it had the red and white "header" delineating a first responder.  After squinting a little I was able to read it.  The lettering said, "Assistant Fire Chief Montpelier Vermont." It was the car belonging to the Quinn family, Shelley and Jim, and their children Aidan and Natalie - a family from Montpelier Public Schools.

Well, I thought, they're probably going into another store in this plaza.  And then Shelley walked into Food Dudes and put their name in for a table.

Well, I thought, they're probably going to be seated somewhere on the other side of the restaurant.  I'll stop over and say hi when we're getting ready to leave.  And then the table right next to us got up to leave.

The Quinns were sitting right next to us, and even so I didn't want to say anything right away.  But just when they were getting ready to place their order, I heard Natalie whisper to her mom: "Mommy, that guy over there looks like Dr. Ricca, and he sounds like Dr. Ricca, but it can't be Dr. Ricca because he's not wearing a tie!"

I introduced My Family to the Quinns and introduced the Quinns to My Family.  We chatted for a little while and then we each enjoyed our meals.  On our way out, the Quinns told us it was their first time in the Outer Banks, so we shared some of our favorite places, besides Food Dudes, and said good-bye.

It is a gift that I serve a single board in Montpelier Public Schools.  Because of that, I am able to spend a great deal of quality time in classrooms, offices and buildings in our district.  I'm proud that students know who I am and recognize me, even when I'm not wearing a tie!  One of the only things that makes me feel old these days, besides my eyesight, is hearing the grades that students are in.  Students that were in first grade when I began serving in MPS are now in seventh, and students that were in sixth grade when I began, are now seniors in high school!

I'm grateful to see smiling student faces when I'm not on campus, and I'm proud that Natalie, Aidan, Shelley, and Jim knew who I was when we bumped into each other more than 750 miles away from Montpelier!  Education is a human endeavor and is built on how we treat each other.  The trust between children and adults is critical to our success, no matter how far away from home we are.

I Buried My Mail App

This past August when My Family and I went on vacation, I wanted to be sure I disconnected from my work life.  I'm very good about protecting vacation and family time and while I'm always reachable by phone and text, I decided to do something to preserve my disconnection even further.  I turned off the notifications for my mail app and took the app off my dock, and hid it in one of my app folders on my iPhone.

My reasons were simple: I did not want that little red number to let me know what was waiting for me when I got back from my vacation.  Not only did I not want to see the number (which was way larger than 11) I did not want to even see the icon.  I planned to put it right back where it belonged when I got back from vacation.

There would be plenty of time to return the mail that accumulated when I was back in the office.  I wanted to ensure that I was being present to my family when I was on vacation.  I read recently that one of people's biggest regrets when the are nearing the end of their lives is that they worked too hard.  Trust me, I am all for hard work - and I am firm in my belief that family vacation is as critical, if not more.

When I returned to the office, I didn't move the app back to the dock where it has always been on my phone.  And I didn't turn the notifications back on.  Then adults returned for their first day, and the app was still hidden, without notifications.  Then students returned, and the app was still hidden.  This Tuesday will be the 27th day of school in MPS and the mail app is still hidden and the notifications are still turned off.

And I have been more present - in my office, in schools when visiting classrooms, in meetings, and with my family.  I have focused more on the human beings in front of me than those who are electronically connecting with me.  I have been present.

Instead of reaching for my phone to see how many messages have come through since I put it in my pocket, I'm using my phone to take pictures.  Instead of reaching for my phone to stay on top of my e-mail, I'm having better face-to-face conversations, letting the messages stay in my inbox.  Instead of looking at my phone, I'm looking at the people right in front of me.

The latest upgrade to iOS 11 includes a do not disturb app that automatically detects when you're driving and does not allow notifications to come through.  I appreciate that nothing comes through on my phone when I'm driving except phone calls, which I can answer hands-free.

Now, please know that I still do check my phone, I know where to find my mail app, and I still respond to mail on the go from time to time.  But I'm proud that I buried my mail app along with the notifications, it will not ever come of out of the folder it's hidden in and the notifications will permanently stay off.  Perhaps someday I'll have the courage to delete it completely.

Snow Day?

This past week, all Montpelier Public Schools' families, along with faculty & staff were treated to an unexpected message from me: No School - Snow Day!  Let me explain...

Last Monday, I was participating in a webinar to learn about the new features of the messaging system that we use in MPS.  The company has recently upgraded to a 2.0 version and among the new features is an app for use with iPhones.  As part of the webinar, I was learning how to utilize the app and send messages from my phone.  I mistakenly thought the process would be similar to the web based program.

When using the web, I would compose my e-mail message and then the shorter text message.  Once I clicked "Next" the following screen would have a pop-up window that has the 800 number to call and a PIN to enter before recording my own voice message.  The app is much more efficient.

When I composed a very brief e-mail and text message, I started to click "Next," thinking I would see a pop-up window on my phone, with the 800 number and a PIN.  Instead, I saw only one thing, a screen that said "Message Sent."

Frantically, I tried to cancel the message but it was too late.  I scrambled to compose a quick follow-up message sharing my mistake.  I then went around to each building to apologize to the teachers, but mostly to the women in our main offices who fielded many, many calls from parents unsure of what my text and e-mail messages meant.  Finally, I used the web based version to write a longer follow-up e-mail, a broader text message, and recorded a message explaining what happened.

When I stopped in to share with people what had actually happened, almost everyone laughed with me when I explained how this came to pass.  It was a very humanizing moment - I had no idea I would send out a fake message on one of the hottest days of the year.  And when I saw the words "Message Sent," I was as surprised and shockec as every single person who received my message last Monday.

The wonderful part of this mistake is that I got to embrace it during the week, since both Main Street Middle School and Union Elementary School had their Open Houses.  Several parents asked if there would be another snow day and every single one did it with a smile on their faces.  Yes, some were understandably concerned when the message first went out, and most knew that it had to be an accident.  As more than one parent told me in so many words, "No offense, but your messages to us are almost never that short."

What started out as an innocent practice exercise, turned into one of the biggest mistakes I've made since being appointed Superintendent of Schools in Montpelier Public Schools.  Let me tell you all about it!

Proficient?

As I wrote about last year during the holiday break, I got progressive lenses - I needed to wear glasses all the time.  My eyes have needed attention for awhile - it started just as reading glasses and went downhill from there.  Over the summer, I struggled wearing my glasses all the time.  While I was running, while playing with My Children, when it was sunny (no I didn't buy the prescription sunglasses), and when I was umpiring.  And yes, I was "that guy" at the beach who had his regular sunglasses over my prescription glasses while reading.

Of course, there's a simple solution to all of this, one that My Wife was fully on board with: contact lenses.  I made an appointment at the end of the summer and it took place this past Tuesday.  I had no idea what to expect and I asked how long I should plan to be there.  About one hour was the response I got back.  Perfectly reasonable.

Once at the appointment, I went through the routine eye exam to confirm my prescription had not changed since last year.  I was offered the different options for lenses, and took the doctor's recommendation.  My doctor then showed me to an empty room and told me someone would be with me to help me learn about how to put my contact lenses in shortly.

Soon I was seated opposite the woman who would teach me how to put in my contact lenses, at a table with a mirror.  I have no problem touching my own eyes I said, and with a quick nod, the lesson began.  "Put the contact lens on your right index finger."  Done.  "Hold your eyelashes from your top eyelid with your left hand, then pull your bottom eyelashes down with your middle finger of your right hand, and place the contact lens in your eye."  Wait... what?

For the next hour or so, I struggled mightily to be proficient at this.  I could not get the contact lenses in my eyes.  The left eye was the trickiest.  As someone who is right-hand dominant, I had to position my hands in just the right way to get the contact lens even close to my left eye.  As it got closer and closer, I would speed up (recommended to go slow), blink (instead of holding my eyelashes open), or some combination of both.  I was unable to do it.

I sat there, realizing how anxious I was, how frustrated I felt, and it was only growing.  I could not do it.  I watched the minutes ticking away and grew more and more upset.  I could not do what was asked of me and I could not leave because I needed to show that I could put the lenses in, take them out, and put them in again for an eye exam.  That was my demonstration of proficiency necessary to get back to work on Tuesday.  I could not do it.

How many of our students feel this way?  How many of our students struggle to meet the proficiency standards that we set?  How patient are we while we scaffold the learning for our students to demonstrate their proficiency?  (It is noteworthy that the woman helping me was encouraging, patient, funny, and kind, during my struggle)

Finally, I was able to put the contact lenses in, both of them, take them out and put them back in.  I had the motivation to stick to the task, to persevere, and to ultimately walk out the door, for the moment proficient.  But that feeling stayed with me throughout the day, and I spoke to a number of people about it, even letting them know this would be my blog post for the week.

Yes, we have made tremendous strides moving away from content toward proficiency.  Yes, personalized learning will help engage students in areas they are passionate about.  And still, with the best of intentions, with real substantial motivation (or at times, without) our students will struggle to be proficient, to demonstrate what they have learned.  Then what?

P. S. It took me 25 minutes to put my left contact lens in on Wednesday morning (30 minutes total), about 23 minutes on Thursday, 30 again on Friday, I wore my glasses on Saturday because I was taking too long, and today only 8 minutes total.

On Overparenting

I am a huge fan of MindShift, a project from KQED.  "MindShift explores the future of learning in all dimensions," and is a part of the public radio family in Northern California.  This summer, I discovered they put out a weekly podcast, and immediately subscribed.  This week's installment spoke to me as a Superintendent, and as a parent.

It started with a former Stanford Dean, Julie Lythcott-Haims (@DeanJulie) describing what she saw in her role as freshmen dean at one of the most prestigious schools in the United States.  It was staggering to hear some of the stories Dean Julie told - parental involvement in roommate situations, in academic situations, in decisions that should ostensibly be made by or handled by college students were full of parental involvement.  In some cases, over-involvement.

As I reflected on my professional practice, I can note a rise in parental involvement, and in come cases, over-involvement since I began teaching in 1996.  There will always be a need for parents to be in contact with teachers and leaders of schools and districts.  But the question is when is it too much?  It's a fine line and one that needs careful reflection and thought before being answered.

One of the most compelling parts of the podcast was the honesty of Dean Julie.  She noted that as she was aware of the college students at Stanford who lacked self-efficacy, she herself was struggling with over-parenting her own children.  Dean Julie remembered specifically a moment when she was cutting her own child's meat, and it made her pause.  It reminded me of a post that I wrote last year about cutting my own child's French Toast.

There was freedom in that honesty - coming from someone who was in a position of asking parents of college students to step back - and then noting that own tendency in herself.  While I am not a Dean at Stanford, I feel the tension that Dean Julie speaks of.  I feel myself wanting parents in Montpelier Public Schools to step back at times and allow their children to fail more and I do not always consistently allow for that in my own parenting.

Life is about mistakes - making them, learning from them, and doing everything we can do not to repeat them.  Just this week, we learned about a mistake made printing the professional soccer jerseys in Montpellier, France.  As a result of that misprint, we will be receiving those jerseys in Montpelier, VT, for our own soccer players.

All MPS children need the age-appropriate freedom to make mistakes, at times free from the watchful eyes of their parents.  The two Ricca children need the same age-appropriate freedom.  I'll promise to be vigilant for your children's freedom.  Will you do the same for me?

It is Still All About #Relationships

One week ago, Frank Bruni wrote a tremendous piece in the New York Times, "The Real Campus Scourge."  I recommend it to anyone in education, whether a PK Teacher, a college President, a member of the cafeteria staff, an athletic director, or a parent.  This is a must read.  Briefly, Bruni notes the loneliness that is impacting college freshmen, particularly, and the impact that technology has on those feelings.

It made me think about my transition to college, twenty five years ago this month during the fall of 1992.  I was incredibly homesick and missed my family.  I was overwhelmed by the amount of work I was assigned, and had not found a group of friends I could connect with yet.  I was in a dorm room built for two, that had three freshmen crammed into it.

During this time, I went to the office hours of a professor with a question about an assignment for his class.  It must have shown on my face or in my body language because he asked me if I was OK.  I took a chance and shared how overwhelmed I was, feeling homesick, unsure of my ability to handle the workload, and not making many friends.

To this day, I have not forgotten what he told me.  In so many words, he offered that the Admissions Department was really good at what they do.  In his experience, they only select students who demonstrate in the admissions process somehow that they can handle the workload, have the abilities, and the determination to be successful and graduate.  Yes, he admitted, there were times when the Admissions Department missed the mark, but despite all that I had just shared with him and that we only met for class a handful of times, he didn't put me in that category.

That half hour in Professor Robert Garvey's office during September of 1992 gave me hope that what I was feeling at that time was temporary, and that I could get through it.  It reminded me that I proved to someone that I could do the work.  Finally, it gave me the confidence that I was lacking.  It wasn't like flipping a light switch, but it was a critical moment in my college experience and one that I can distinctly remember twenty five years later.

While it may be easy to blame the fact that back then there was no voicemail, the internet was confined to computer labs, I didn't have an e-mail address, let alone two, and (wait for it) there were no smartphones, that misses the point.  Do all those things (any many more) have incredible upsides and inevitable drawbacks?  Absolutely!  So we can't throw the baby out with the bathwater.

Our third goal in the MPS Action Plan is "All students will take an active role in shaping their learning experiences and developing who they are as learners."  This is the work that will help bridge the gap that Bruni exposes very articulately in his article.  This is the place where we can make a difference as adults, aware of this gap, in the lives of our students.  This is a critical place for students going forward, learning to balance the technology in their hands and the human beings in front of them.

Professor Garvey is still a Physics Professor at the College of the Holy Cross, my undergraduate alma mater.  Thanks to technology, I'll be reaching out to him and sending him this blog post.  I cannot underscore how important that one conversation was in my life.  I hope that someday given a similar opportunity, I can do something like that for a student of mine.

Safe and Included

This past Wednesday, we welcomed back to school our first through twelfth graders in Montpelier Public Schools.  I spent all day Wednesday and all day Friday in our classrooms, visiting with students and teachers as they returned to learn some new routines, meet classmates for the first time, reconnect with classmates they already know, and begin setting the foundation for growth and progress this year.

When I welcomed our faculty and staff back to school one week ago, I urged them to ensure that every single student in Montpelier Public Schools felt safe and included.  Not in a token way - but instead in a foundational way that encouraged all students to be exactly who they are, regardless of skin color, whom they love, or what gender they identify as.  If we are to expect our students to learn and grow, they must feel safe and included when they come to school.

Equity is one of our primary focuses this year in Montpelier Public Schools.  In our Action Plan, our first goal is to "provide equitable learning opportunities for students in safe and inclusive learning environments."  We should not expect anything less for someone else's children, as we would not expect anything less for our own.  This means meeting children where they are, ensuring tremendous first instruction for all students, then finding ways to intervene thoughtfully that ensure growth and progress appropriate for all our learners.

Given the reality of our world in 2017, this goal is critical.  While hearing the words safe and included may cause some to think we are shielding our students too much from the world around them, for me it's preparing them to be exactly who they are to go out into our world.  In Vermont, children are compelled to attend school from six through the age of sixteen.  If they are legally bound to attend our schools, the very least we can do is embrace who they are - and ensure that their classmates will do the same.

This commitment to a safe and inclusive learning environment for all students is one that will take a consistent effort from all the adults.  At times, we may stumble along the way.  But since no one rises to low expectations, we will remain steadfast in this commitment.  Our own children would not expect anything less, and neither will someone else's children.

The Best Seat in the House

On Friday night, the Montpelier High School Class of 2017 paid their final visit to the school they've called home for the last four years.  They entered the gymnasium as students and left as alumni.  It was a fitting tribute to a class of talented and gifted individuals, who sang, danced and orated that night the way they sang, danced, and orated while they matriculated through our high school.

I had the best seat in the house - sitting on stage, alongside Mike McRaith and Michele Braun (the high school principal and Board Chair).  I was able to see the delight and pride in the eyes of family and friends as the graduates walked in.  I was able to see their eyes shine, at time with tears of joy and at time with tears of sadness, throughout the night.  The iPhones and cameras were held aloft as people scrambled in front to capture the perfect moment: while walking in, while speaking at the podium, while mid-dance step, while singing, while receiving their diploma, while walking out.

A few weeks earlier, I was invited to a similar ceremony in a classroom at Union Elementary School.  Once again, there were parents with cameras and tears, students who entered the classroom as members of one cohort, only to leave as another, and a group of teachers reading about accomplishments and handing something to their students.  And again, I had the perfect vantage point to witness all that.  That day, we celebrated pre-kindergarten students completing their year together.

Such similar emotions for families fourteen or fifteen years away from high school graduation. This week, I will again have the opportunity to witness a moving up ceremony and a middle school graduation.  I will be in the presence of the culmination of emotions for families and teachers as they pause to honor the students who have been a part of their lives.  It is bittersweet as we recognize the people who have walked alongside and will remain behind while students move ahead to the next educational level.

Congratulations to the MHS Class of 2017, the Eighth Graders from MSMS graduating and the Fourth Graders from UES moving up this week.  Know how proud we are of all of you!

Last Friday night, I watched a mom and a dad fight back tears while their son spoke articulately and beautifully from the podium.  I cannot imagine the feelings of pride they must have had, while they replayed in their heads (I'm guessing) the first eighteen years of this young man's life.  I wondered how I will feel the nights Our Sons graduate from high school and what will be running through my head when I see them walk down the aisle, receive their diplomas, and walk out of the ceremony as alumni.

I wonder who will have the best seat in the house.  

So What Have You Learned This Year?

As we approach the last two weeks of school, it is natural to start asking these questions of our students to assess their growth and progress.  For adults, it's equally as important to reflect on our year to see what are the lessons we can take away and grow from.

This has been one of the hardest years I've experienced in quite some time, perhaps the hardest year of my life.  My Wife had a routine surgery on February 3, and ended up with two emergency surgeries three and four weeks later.  The lack of control that I felt was something I never want to experience again and I am grateful for the amazing care that was shown to her and to me throughout this process.  To this day, people in MPS still come up to me and ask how she is doing.  I am truly touched by each and every person who reaches out.

Still I have learned a lot, through this ordeal.  However, two things stand out.

Be humble.  The turning point for My Wife was when her surgeon anonymously shared her case with her colleagues, asking for help from others.  The surgeon recognized the limitations of her medical specialty and turned to her colleagues for assistance.  We all have blind spots, we are all limited by our natural abilities, our learned skills, our humanity.  We are surrounded by amazing people on a regular basis who we have the opportunity to learn from, if we allow them to teach us.

Be kind.  It may sound trite but it is really true.  While I felt a great deal of anger and frustration from the lack of answers in My Wife's medical case, I knew nothing would be gained if I was not thoughtful in my interactions with the various medical professionals we were interacting with. Intuitively, I knew it would not help My Wife at all and it may have hindered her care.  This New York Times article was shared with me and validated my thinking.  One of the hallmarks of my time in education and educational leadership is that I would rather be kind than be right.  And while I don't get there every time, it is the standard that I strive to attain.

Please, if you are reading this blog post take a minute - literally one minute - and respond.  Post your comment below.  Share your learning from this year.  One or two words - no explanation necessary.  I would love to see what we have learned collectively as educators, as people, since August 2016.

So what have you learned this year?

So You Still Think Twitter is Just for Celebrities?

I've been on Twitter since 2011, when I started serving Montpelier Public Schools as Superintendent.  It's been a tremendous opportunity for professional growth, for making contacts, and for continuing to learn from others.  As my MPS colleague Mike Martin (@Mike_MPS) told me a couple of years ago, Twitter is a way to connect with others based on the merit of the idea. It is not about age, job titles, or roles.  It isn't even necessary to meet in person, because the connection is about the idea!

Recently I was humbled to be a part of a panel at the VITA-Learn Dynamic Landscapes Conference about the relationship between school librarians and administrators.  One of the members of the panel was Michael Berry (@MichaelBerryEDU) Director of Curriculum, Communication & Innovation for MMMUSD-CESU Schools.  We work less than a half hour away from each other, follow each other on Twitter, live in the State of Vermont and up until that panel conversation, had never met in person.  Once we did speak after the panel, it was an easy conversation because we had mutual admiration for each other based on what we posted on Twitter.

However, the real highlight for me this year was an invitation to the First Grade Play "Wing It," and it came through Twitter.  Here is their invitation.  The invitation was from UES Teachers Susan Koch (@SusanKochVT), Linda Dostie (@LindaDostie) & Samantha Funk (@TheWiseMusician).  I have never been invited to anything via video on Twitter and was proud not only to respond via video on Twitter (my very first) as well as go to UES for the wonderful play which was an amazing culmination of the collaboration between our Music, Art, and First Grade Teachers.  A wonderful time was had by all and it was another very proud moment for me as Superintendent.

Yes, there are people who waste time on Twitter.  Yes, there are people who tweet ridiculous things.  Yes, there are people who post nonsense.  But you can choose not to follow these people and trust me, Twitter is much, much more than this.

This platform can do so much for education and educators.  It is free and allows us to connect with other people, honing our skills, learning new ones, and growing in ways that traditional professional development simply cannot approach.  Most importantly for me, it is about relationships.  That is the basis of what we do in education.  I would have never seen Wing It if not for the Twitter invitation, and I would have missed a tremendous, student-centered event in person!

So you still think Twitter is just for celebrities?

Pay it Forward

One of the joys of parenting, is learning from my children.  Much like I expect to learn from my students professionally, I expect to learn from my own children.

Our oldest son Patrick and I were washing our hands in a bathroom recently.  When we had finished and dried them, he went back to the paper towel dispenser, and gently pulled down the next paper towel.  I asked him why he did that.  His response: "So that the next person can really easily get their paper towel to dry their hands."  He was very nonchalant about it, and while I was overwhelmed that he was being so thoughtful, for Patrick, it was just his way of being in the world.

It's a small way for Patrick to pay it forward, making the road easier and lighter for someone else. Even something as simple as readying the next paper towel for someone after they wash their hands.  Such a small gesture has such a practical impact, with such a meaningful intention behind it.

This conversation prompted me to share with Patrick how early on in my superintendency, I relied on (and still do to this day) my colleagues around the state.  One of the things that the Vermont Superintendents' Association prides itself on is our responsiveness to colleagues.  When one reaches out for help, others are there to respond.  I distinctly remember talking to a colleague around a particularly thorny issue in my first year and his perspective helped me find a solution.  I was effusive in my gratitude and the only thing my colleague asked of me was to pay it forward.  He wanted to make sure that when I got the opportunity to help out a fellow educational leader, I did so in the way that he helped me.

Today is Memorial Day, a day to remember all the men and women who have served our country, especially those who died.  My life has been touched by those who chose to serve this country in the military and for that I am incredibly grateful.  And while I do not wish to glorify war, I have a deep respect for those who have served and the families that supported them while they were away.  The memories of those who served are kept alive by the hope of peace.

Perhaps peace is too much to ask or hope for right now.  Maybe it's just making the road for others a little bit easier, one paper towel at a time.  Take a minute this week to do that for someone else.  Pay it forward.

Lifelong Learning

It is, after all, the name of my blog!

Often in education we talk about the importance of a commitment to lifelong learning.  We are working diligently to ensure that our students begin to measure their success in terms of learning and progress, rather than simply a letter or a number grade.  We are helping even our youngest students begin to collect evidence of their own learning, rather than simply relying on a teacher to be the only one responsible for this documentation.

We must remember that in our educational communities, we have many people besides the professional educators, who serve students and our families.  I am proud that as I look around Montpelier Public Schools, there are many examples of lifelong learning, including from adults. One of the reasons I am so proud is that there are examples of lifelong learning from adults in our district, not just teachers.

One of those people is our School Resource Officer, Corporal Matt Knisley.  Recently Matt graduated from Roger Williams University, completing first line supervisor command training. This is a two-week program at RWU and is conducted in partnership with the New England Chiefs of Police Association.  It is noteworthy that all Montpelier Police Department sergeants and corporals are graduates of this leadership school.

Another individual demonstrating lifelong learning is the Head Custodian at Union Elementary School, Todd Keller.  Todd is completing a Bachelor of Science degree in Business Management with a Human Resources Management Certification.  When Susan Koch was named the Vermont State Teacher of the Year award, part of it includes the gift of more education.  After thoughtful reflection, Susan chose Todd who jumped at the opportunity and was effusively grateful.

The Montpelier Public Schools Board of School Commissioners put money aside in each negotiated agreement for further education and training.  It is an expectation for educators to model this commitment to lifelong learning.  It is a gift to the children and the adults in this district that there examples of lifelong learning that come from people other than teachers.  It is my expectation as Superintendent, that all employees of Montpelier Public Schools make a commitment to grow and learn in their role.

It is one thing to put money aside for lifelong learning.  It is one thing to say it you are a lifelong learner.  It is another thing altogether to have stellar exemplars for our students, and adults, to look to of lifelong learning.

What Are We About?

The end of the year is on the horizon and summer is coming.  The days are getting longer and even in Vermont, a little bit warmer.  Students and adults are starting to get a little restless, given the calendar, the warmth and it's natural to reflect on what we've done this year.

When we take stock of what we've done in education, it's natural to try to boil it down to accomplishments, test scores, and things that are measurable.  That's a perfectly reasonable approach to assessing where we stand at the end of the year.  But there's much more to the story than just numbers.

We know this because the Vermont Agency of Education has created a Education Quality Review process that is both qualitative and quantitative.  We know this because decades of peer-reviewed educational research tells us so.  We know this because it is common sense.

Education is about children, the teachers that work tirelessly to serve them, and the other cadre of adults that work tirelessly to support the teachers on a daily basis.  So how do you measure this and assess whether you've made a difference in the life of a child?  

There's no easy answer to this and the answer is different for each individual faculty, staff, and administrator.  We each need to assess this for ourselves, reflect and find ways to improve for next year.  What is the evidence we will use to evaluate this for ourselves?

It's May.  What is the evidence can we use to answer the question: What are we about?

The 4 Way Test

I recently joined the Montpelier Rotary.  I have been looking for more ways to be able to connect with the Montpelier community.  After a lunch where our elementary students sang, I was approached by a current member.  He's a former superintendent from New York and after a cup of coffee at Capitol Grounds, I decided to join.  It is a service organization, "where neighbors, friends, and problem-solvers share ideas, join leaders, and take action to create lasting change" (www.rotary.org). My grandfather was a Rotarian and I deeply admired and respected him.

One of the guiding principles of Rotary is the 4 Way Test:

We say it at the beginning of every meeting and it grounds the work of the Rotary, as I can observe from the limited time since I've been a member.

Seems to me there's room for the 4 Way Test in many more places than Rotary though.  Applying this in our professional and personal realms would give us room to reflect on what we think, say, and do.  Given the nature of the test, affirming each of these questions, or at the very least the majority of them, will ensure that what we think, say and do have a good, solid foundation.  For me, the 4 Way Test also goes a long way to honoring relationships, critical to our work.

One of the wonderful things about working in education and with children on a regular basis, is that we need to hold them to high standards when it comes to their relationships, both with each other and with us as adults.  We must hold ourselves to those same expectations.  We cannot, we must not, have one standard for students and another for ourselves.  Gone are the days of do as I say, not as I do - and nor were those days very effective either.

Across our district, I routinely see and hear adults ensuring that students are actively listening, honoring feelings, and being respectful of one another.  It is critical that as adults we are doing the same thing, even if we are having a conversation with someone who believes the antithesis of what we believe.  It is easy to be respectful when we agree with someone.  We establish ourselves as exemplars when we listen, honor feelings, and are respectful to someone who believes something we don't.  We all put our pants on one leg at a time...

Our world certainly feels differently than it has in recent years.  There is much more polarizing rhetoric, quick judgements, and harsh commentary.  That is not a value statement - just an observation.  When we hear that in our classrooms, hallways, and athletic fields, we as adults are quick to intervene and address it.  We need to do the same for ourselves.  It takes courage and integrity.

Perhaps we need to more consistently apply The 4 Way Test.

Sharing Begets More Sharing

Since I've returned to work, so many people have stopped me to check in to see how My Wife is doing, and many have been thoughtful enough to ask me how I'm doing as well.  A funny thing happens when I share my story, others share theirs.

Since my first day back, since literally the first time someone stopped me in the hall, I learned about others who are also caring for a loved one.  I had absolutely no idea.  These are people that I have passed in the hallways, seen in classrooms, or had conversations with in my office. They are faculty and staff in our district and they have been able to carry out their assigned duties without a noticeable difference.  It reminded me of this sign I have seen in people's offices around campus:

When I was a baby teacher back in the late 90's, I was told to never smile before the holiday break in December.  Boy did I fall short at that.  It was so against my nature.  But a funny thing happened when I started smiling more in my class, my students smiled more too.  And as I started to share more of the story of who I was with my students, they started to share more of the stories of who they were with me.  It made me such a better teacher, because I knew my students.  Our classroom was a better place because we had a better understanding of each other.

This idea that sharing begets more sharing resonates in Marianne Williamson's book A Return to Love.  "And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give people permission to do the same." The more we allow who we are to come forth, others feel welcome to allow who they are to come forth.  The same principle holds for any relationship - sharing begets more sharing.

We are in the midst of an era of personalized learning plans, ways in which students and their families are making education more meaningful, identifying places that learning takes place outside the classroom, and building better connections to what happens away from the school building.  It seems like a natural time to be more vulnerable and open with our students, and with each other. Sharing begets more sharing.

#Kindness Matters

This month at Union Elementary School, there has been a kindness challenge, complete with wristbands!

I was given a wristband last week and started wearing it right away.  Driving to basketball practice with My Boys last weekend, Patrick noticed it and asked me about it.  I explained that the entire elementary school was given a challenge to be kind and that completing a certain number of acts of kindness, earned a prize.  One of the prizes in the first week was lunch with the UES Head Custodian and a tour of the basement (very popular in the car at that time) and another was lunch with the UES Principal at Positive Pie (one of My Family's favorite pizza places in Montpelier). There was silence in the car.

Then Brendan spoke up, "What if we were a part of the challenge?"  He wanted do something with the students at UES.  "What if we got to eat with one of the winners?"  I started to think about that...

This past Friday was a non-student day in Chittenden South Supervisory Union, My Boys were coming to work with me.  The idea started to percolate with me a little more...

Once we got to practice, I quickly e-mailed UES Principal Chris Hennessey and Cathy Clements who gave me the wristband that started this whole conversation.  I heard back from both that it could work.

With a little legwork from the fine folks at Union Elementary School, this past Friday at Positive Pie in Montpelier, two deserving first graders from Mrs. Dostie's class and Mr. Hennessey joined Brendan and me (Patrick was home sick) for a #kindness celebration!

I am proud of the commitment to relationships that we have in MPS, starting with our youngest learning community.  I am proud that adults lead the way by developing and maintaining relationships with our students, and demonstrate in words and in deeds that this is important to being a human being on this planet.

It is incredibly important to me as well.  In my role as Superintendent, I would rather be kind than be right and while it doesn't happen every time, it is something that I consistently strive for. People and relationships are central to the work we do, so for me it is critical for all to understand that #kindness matters.

The Power and the Humility of Collaboration

Throughout this ordeal with My Wife's medical condition, I've experienced a range of emotions. From the utter frustration and borderline anger with the answer "I don't know," which has been said to us more often than either one of us is comfortable.  To the relief and exhilaration of each milestone that we cross.  For example, this past Friday marks three weeks since any surgery has taken place. While it may seem like a simple accomplishment, remember that for us, there were two consecutive weeks where My Wife had emergency surgeries in the middle of the night.  It is the simple things...

One of the most important steps in this entire process was being linked with hematology for possible answers to the most troubling questions in My Wife's medical case.  This did not happen by accident and in fact, it happened through a very thoughtful and deliberative moment.  That moment took place when My Wife's surgeon realized she could not come up with all the answers. We had many, many conversations with her - some were hurried, in corridors of the University of Vermont Medical Center that I never knew existed (nor do I ever want to be in again), some were in the comfort and peace of her office, and many were over the phone.

I tried as best I could to be patient - to remember that this surgeon is after all, another human being who puts her pants on one leg at a time, just like I do.  (As a side note, during my Family Medical Leave, I came across this article in the New York Times - it continues to be all about #relationships). I knew that she was doing everything she could, I knew she was frustrated, and I could feel her empathy and compassion constantly.

After the third surgery, our surgeon recognized the limits of her specialty and let us know that she was going to share My Wife's case with other surgeons and physicians (anonymously of course). She was recognizing the limits of her specialty.  What a powerful and humbling step.

She started to hear back from colleagues and there were not a lot of ideas.  I wondered if this was just another dead end.  Then a break came when one of her colleagues mentioned that she once needed to refer a patient to hematology.  We were grasping at straws and through the power of relationships (and the fact that we live in a small state) we were able to see a hematologist the following day. While we still do not have all the answers, we have been able to see progress.

In education, there are limits to our professional abilities.  Despite our best efforts, we cannot reach every student, with his/her family life dynamics, on our own.  In life, we have limits to our human capacity.  There is only so much time, so we ask others to shuttle our children and we shuttle theirs to and from rehearsals, practices, and banquets.  We trust, rely on, and look for others in our professional world and in our personal world.  It is about #relationships.

When we have those moments, professionally or personally, I hope that we have the honesty, vulnerability, and humility to admit that we are at the end of our rope.  I hope we are able to turn to someone else we trust and ask for help.  I know that but for the power and humility of collaboration, My Wife would not have made as much progress as she has thus far.  We all have those moments - please pick one this week, and allow someone in your life, professionally or personally, to benefit from the power and the humility of collaboration.

Letting Go

I am just returning to work after taking a medical leave to care for My Wife.  What was expected to be a routine surgery turned into something much scarier and much more serious.  Instead of one surgery, My Wife needed three.  Instead of recuperating from the original surgery and returning to her full time job two weeks ago, she needs to stay at home to continue to recover and is unable to drive.  There isn't much in the past six weeks I wish would never have happened, except for the fact that I've learned the value in letting go. 

There's been a great deal that I've had to let go of because it was simply out of my control.  Three times I hurriedly kissed My Wife, while she was laying on a stretcher about to be wheeled into an operating room.

I've relied on numerous friends and family members to care for Our Children - not always having the time to share details about when to take asthma medicine, what the bedtime routine looks like, and what's appropriate for them to watch on TV.

Dinners have arrived at our house two or three times a week, without any specifics about what Our Children do or don't eat.

During the February vacation, people came by and picked Our Children up and kept them for the entire day.  They returned home happy, with full bellies, and completely tired from all the fun they had.

These past weeks have been a lesson in letting go.  Aside from some truly terrifying moments, the act of letting go was liberating.  The sun rose the following morning, Our Children demonstrated a phenomenal capacity to learn and grow with this medical journey that we are on, and I felt surrounded by a work community and a personal community that embraced our struggle. 

Even though it's not something I'm used to, and I hope the reasons for it don't ever repeat themselves, I grew so much from letting go. 

This morning, some beautiful flowers arrived at my office from My Family, thanking my Work Family for all their love and support

The note reads: Thank you all for letting us borrow Dr. Ricca for so long. I know his absence was felt and your kind words meant a great deal to all of us. Love, Michal, Patrick & Brendan

It Still Is (And Always Will Be) About Relationships

A couple of weeks ago, I read a blog post by Bobby Dodd (@bobby_dodd) about why relationships are the foundation of education.  It resonated with me for obvious reasons - this is something that is at the cornerstone of my leadership.  What I took particular note of was the quote from Robert John Meehan at the end of his post:

The only quibble I have with Meehan's quote is that it refers only to students; I would humbly change the last word to people.

I can reflect on a number of times in the past several weeks in which people have made a point to come up to me in person and share something that I have done that is meaningful to them.  The conversations usually start the same way, "This is just a little thing but..." or "This won't take long..." or "It's not a big deal, I just wanted to tell you..." and yet each time, I left the conversation feeling proud of something that I had done that someone else noticed.  I responded in kind - sharing how meaningful it was to me, not only that this person noted what I had done but that they took the time to share it with me as well.  I was humbled and touched by the kindness.  Not something I will easily forget.

There's a high school student that I've met just this past year that loves blackberries.  My typical snack mid-morning is a yogurt, granola and blackberries.  There's a small refridgerator in between the Business Office and Support Services Office across the hall from me and one time as I was returning to my office with this snack, and this young woman said as she passed me said, "I really like blackberries."  Without thinking, I stopped, turned and opened the container of blackberries and offered her some.  She said, "Really?"  "Of course," I responded.  Since then, I cannot pass her in the hall without her asking if I have any blackberries...

My final example of a "little conversation" came a week ago, as Montpelier was reeling with the shocking death of a man, who has a little boy in our Pre-Kindergarten class.  The e-mail came to me pretty late Sunday night:

It is an incredible relief to me at a time like this that our community (i have one kid in the high school and one in the middle school) has such an incredible team running things: you, Mike, Pam, and Chris, and everyone doing the teaching on the ground.  Tomorrow will be a hugely sad day, like today was, but it is a great honor to know that our kids will be loved at school as they are at home.  

When I get messages like that, they get starred and put away for a rainy day.

There are a lot of big things happening in our world, in our nation, in our state, and in Montpelier.  There are loud voices, there are large problems, and there are great debates that are taking place.  But this week, I challenge us all to make it a point to share a "little" something to make someone else's day, to bring a smile to their face, to show someone else how meaningful they are to you.  If you can do it in person, that works best.  Yet a phone call or e-mail can be just as noteworthy.  Simply taking the time to better a relationship with a "little" thing will preserve and grow that relationship.

It still is (and always will be) about relationships.