Find Your Balance

We said good bye to our Malachy last Tuesday, on a bright, sunny, spring afternoon, after she spent her last active moments playing with Her Boys with a tennis ball and posing for one final picture.

It was truly one of the hardest things My Wife and I have ever done together.  We sat with her in her final moments and said good bye together.  That night, we read Dog Heaven together with Our Boys and shared tears as a family, comforting each other.

We've decided on how we want to memorialize her in our own way, remembering the wonderful life she gave us and the wonderful life we gave her.  One of our dear friends has already picked out a piece of granite for us, we want to buy a tree to plant in our yard, and find a meaningful way to remember the almost twelve years she shared with us.

One of the other things we are doing as a family is wearing Lokai bracelets.  These bracelets are made up of one black bead, one white bead, and the remaining beads are clear.  The black bead holds mud from the Dead Sea, the lowest point on Earth.  The white bead holds water from Mount Everest, the highest point on Earth.  The bracelets are a reminder to find your balance.  From their website: "Sometimes you've hit a low, stay hopeful.  Sometimes you're on top of the world, stay humble."  Find your balance.

What a great life lesson, what a great leadership lesson.  I never had a dog growing up and so I never experienced the grief of saying good bye to a pet, that truly becomes a part of your life, your heart, your family.  Little by little this week, it's been easier to talk about Malachy, to share our story, to be in the house without her.  Such it is with leadership.  There are times where things are going so well, students' needs are being met and they're learning, faculty & staff feel empowered and engaged, and the community is supportive.  And there are times when one, two, or all three of those are out of kilter, and the balance is off.  Our challenge is to find our balance.  My balance is different than yours because my life and journey in educational leadership is different than yours.

I challenge us all to find what it is that defines balance for us, in our work world and in our personal world.  Often, just balancing those two realms requires a substantial amount of humility and hope.  If we can remember that those two elements will serve us when we need them, we can strive to be present and to find our balance.

Postscript: I want to sincerely thank everyone who reads this blog and who came to speak to me in person, who e-mailed me, who called me, who brought me coffee, who took me to breakfast, and who was my friend last week.  I feel tremendously grateful and overwhelmed by the support that I was shown last week.  Know of my heartfelt thanks for all the kind gestures I have received for my family and me.