It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year

At least, that's what Andy Williams said. The popular Christmas song was written in 1963 by Edward Pola and George Wyle, and I have distinct memories of it playing on my parent's record player during the holiday season. Yes, a record player. I currently have that song, along with many others, on my iPhone playlist. I have fond memories of Christmas in our home, for almost every year except one. 

My grandfather passed away in the spring of 1983. That Christmas was different. It was somehow muted and slightly less "bright" than the others. There was an empty seat at the table that would have been his. 

In the East Greenwich Community this holiday season, there will be three empty seats that families will experience for the first time. Dr. Steven Arnoff, our former Director of Technology, passed away on November 24 last year. Ryan Casey passed away on November 18. Bob Houghtaling passed away on December 8. None of those deaths were expected, and each person left an indelible imprint on many, many people. 

When My Wife was eight years old, her dad passed away. Since then, almost forty years ago, every holiday season has been bittersweet. Patrick Gendron missed all of the significant milestones in her life: sweet sixteen, high school and college graduation, first job, our wedding, the birth of our children, and all of the celebratory moments in the lives of his grandchildren. 

I never got to meet My Wife's father. In his honor, we named our oldest son Patrick Michael. His pictures are in frames in our home. 

Not every family will be decking the halls merry and bright this holiday season. For some, the losses of loved ones are fresh and still tangibly painful. For some, the losses of others are distant memories, but the feelings are so close that we could almost touch them. For me, I can go nearly eleven months of the year knowing that my grandfather passed away forty-one years ago, and I can accept that. Yet, I wanted him to be at the table with us Thanksgiving and to have had the opportunity to meet his great-grandchildren. And I will want him to be a part of this year's holiday traditions, which are dotted with the ones I grew up with that he was a part of. 

But the show must go on. There is the business of Teaching and Learning. There is the work of building the budget for next year. The families of East Greenwich Public Schools expect us to be ready to engage, instruct, assess, and meet the social-emotional needs of our students in this hectic time between Thanksgiving and the Winter Holiday Recess. 

Whether the 2024 holiday season is causing us to miss loved ones who just passed away, those who have been gone for decades, or perhaps some people are fortunate to not be grieving any loss at all. They might be aching to be reunited with estranged loved ones. They might be dealing with a family member struggling with mental illness or an addiction. Or any myriad of items that impact families. 

We can be kind. We can be gentle. We can be compassionate. We can be empathetic. We can listen. We can withhold judgment. We can create safe spaces for people to not be OK. 

Then it can be the most wonderful time of the year. 

Photo Courtesy of Steph Edwards (@toyoufromsteph)